📌Here are essential questions to ask yourself when assessing your relationship:
1. How do I feel in this relationship? Are you often anxious, fearful, walking on eggshells around your partner?
2. Are disagreements handled respectfully? Do conflicts escalate quickly into shouting, manipulation, or blame games? Try him from the beginning, don’t be afraid to test his waters!
3.Do I feel valued and respected? Are your opinions, boundaries, and needs acknowledged and respected by your partner? Are you feeling clever and intelligent in your conversations with him? Or do you feel like it’s better not to express your true opinions because of how he would feel? ( if he is not mature enough, then step away! You are not his mother!)
4. Is there isolation from friends and family? Does your partner discourage or prevent you from spending time with parents, friends or taking time for your hobbies ? ( he is not your child either, so you can plan things for your wellbeing without asking his permission or checking his needs! )
5. How does my partner communicate? Is there a pattern of intimidation, verbal threats, or controlling behavior? ( it’s not about doing what he likes or wants, it’s about feeling your are estimated and valued!)
6. Do I feel guilty or responsible for their behavior? Is your partner constantly blaming you for their actions or emotions? Even if he doesn’t say it, does he making you feel that you are to cause of it? If there is no understanding, then is better to say next!
7. Are there sudden mood swings or extreme possessiveness? Is your partner excessively jealous or possessive, often alternating between extreme affection and hostility? This is a clear sign that he is not the right person! RUN!!!
To understand if your partner has abusive tendencies, approaching the following conversation with CARE is crucial.
are questions to ask your partner:
1. Assess their understanding of healthy communication and conflict resolution. Test him with small disagreement!
2.Understanding their perspective on boundaries and respect is essential. Keep secrets! Don’t reveal everything!
3. Evaluate whether they resort to aggression or control.
4. Assess their attitude towards your support network and their willingness to let you maintain those connections. Ex: what do you think about a friend who told me this….?( give false names, don’t put your friends in wrong situations!)
5. test their receptiveness to open communication and constructive discussions.
6. Understanding their perceptions can shed light on whether they align with a healthy, respectful partnership. Ex. What does it mean to you a healthy relationship?
( to be continued with examples, but please, share in comments yours! )
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